Never Go Full Retard

after a full fillment of the pull it's important to take a few steps on your own. once the tugging has worn you away into creating it seems to stop and leave you all alone. It seems to cease when I've only just begun, but there's more and more and more and much much more to say. There's always words that are willing to come if I just let them flow. If I just open my mouth wide enough I can word vom out into existence the thoughts that permeate in nothingness. Too hard to follow? Once the race that you're running has been run there's still steps for you to take to get home. And once you're home there's no where you can go to be left alone, with just nothingness.
such is the life.
such is the life that I crave. Such is the life that I want, to never be full filled, to never be satisfied with slack. To never want just a little room to roam about in lazy-noncontemplation.
I once knew an alcoholic then I became one.
I once knew a user then I was one.
I once saw a life wasted then I lived one.
Pull me along dancing feet and laughing good times, the spirit of gravity has over taken me for too long. The spirit of gravity has weighed me down until I came to a place where I didn't even recognize my...
You know the rest.
Watch out because it seems like it's something that could affect the best of us.
Watch out.
Melancholy is a great way for me to tighten the rope. Melancholy is a great way to push myself forward because it's subtle, because it gnaws, because it's sweet. Melancholy, my favorite way to be. still.
Melancholy is the melody to my happy dancing feet, my light shoulders that shrug off even the greatest weight, my mind that does nothing but accept and choose again and again and infinitely once more. Because the opposite is not the way to be but the way to non being. The opposite is a leaving of this world for some other place where everything is forgiven.
my laughing feet.
my dancing feet.
my animal friends.
if there is a society you can have it. if there is a place of rest you can rest there. if there is a couch without thorns you can sit there. if there is a slave you can share it. if there is redemption you can redeem it. if there is no sorrow you can cry it. if there is something that you need you can have it. if you lack than you can enjoy the lack. if you laugh at me then you can have your laughter because though i dance the dance of the idiot I'm all the wiser. Though I may be the fool, I play the part knowingly. Though I may not be communicable, though I may not be understood, I understand myself.
I know the whys.
I make the choices.
I see the outcomes through.
I am the change,
inside of me,
and out of control of you.
and it's a good song to sing and it's a fun way to be and it's nothing other than:






Everybody I know seems to know me well
--but does anybody know I'm gonna move like hell
--but they're never gonna know cause I move like hell.